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Someone Hire Me This Actor!

**SLOW CLAP**  Brad, you are fucking hired!  Even though I have absolutely no idea how I can afford someone of your caliber, or even what I’d have you do, I need your services here at  I don’t give a fuck that you look like kids I made fun of in high school.  I don’t care that your face makes me want to punch it.  I don’t even mind that you have little to no discernible acting skills.  These things really don’t matter on the internet.  I mean, this type of acting reel is gold.  10 years from now people are still gonna be watching this video, laughing at you in your awkward poses and thanking God they don’t have your voice.  That translates into hits, hits lead to money, money leads to bitches.  So let’s fucking go Brad.  I’ll have you do videos left and right if I had you in my stable.  Job security like a motherfucker Brad.  Let’s do this.